Friday 7 October 2011

The [Legally Voidable] Wedding of River Song.

Everyone has been asking for a review from me on this episode. I guess the fact River Song made an honest man out of the Doctor had everyone thinking I'd be enraged that my least favourite character EVER has actually married the doctor. And you are right, I was disgusted. But I actually rather enjoyed that episode up until that point. Infact I've been enjoying all the episodes recently, I've just not blogged about them because I've been very busy, not even watching the episodes until a week later, being in paris and moving back to uni, which actually takes longer than it does for me to get to bristol airport, get a plane to charles de gaulle, get on the RER, change at challet les halles, get off at Chatou Croissy, and walk to my bourgeois mansion in villa lambert. (yes I stayed in a real mansion, my boyfriend has friends in high places) So I'd happily go back to paris any day rather than drive to Abersytwyth wich my travel sickness. But as I was saying, The God delusion was brilliant, I love a psychoanalysis study of faith and Doctor Who deconstructing this was just excellent. I also enjoyed last weeks episode, despite my hatred for James Corden. I believe he's only funny when he's been scripted for, he himself, is an annoying man who can't take other people calling him fat, when his sole career has been built on the fact he's tubby. Which is why that episode actually worked, but I kept worrying the baby was suddenly going to be announced as the evil one, I just seemed to be inclining that way.



But obviously you want my opinion on this episode, the season final. Although thanks to the huge gap mid series, I'm left feeling rather deflated and short changed. There was a distinct lack of fluency and clarity in the script. Matt Smith quickly goes from morbid to exuberant faster than light and this inconsistency makes the episode weak. On a positive note, Matt put in much effort in every one of his scenes, despite poor writing.

The best part was that the conclusion was actually relatively simple. Something my boyfriend who isn't a whovian could actually follow. It irks me the need to over complicate Doctor Who these days, too much technobabble and not enough story line. The idea that is wasn't the Doctor who died, but actually the doctor was hidden inside a teselector double. Basically the Doctor in a doctor suit. Brilliant. And when River looked into his eye it was hilarious to see him flamboyantly flouncing about. Moffat wrong-footed us by making us think it would be the Flesh Doctor on the beach, it’s still in essence the same get-out clause – a double. I also rather enjoyed the way the Doctor's morbidity and sense of self hatred which had been darkening out saturday evenings was overturned and he was finally portrayed as the much loved hero he is. The whole universe wanting to help him and appreciating him. It took us back to the Tennant times when the doctor was viewed by the universe a a saviour, not a fearsome warrior and I much prefer it that way.

As a law student however, I was to comment on the legitimacy of the marriage. I don't believe it's a valid marriage and would be declared void under any court ruling. Firstly, since 5 November 2007, a couple getting married are required to to give notification in person of their intention to marry to a Registrar at least 3 months before the intended date of the marriage, this is to allow people the chance to come say "I object" if they do so know of any unlawful reason that would void the marriage. This clearly did not happen, it was very spur of the moment and quicker than a Vegas ceremony. Unless the doctor uses his time machine to go back three months and publish the wedding, but I highly doubt any objectors would be able to find the marriage ceremony. Which leads to my other argument on the invalidity of the marriage, technically, the marriage never even happened. River reassured her mother that she hadn't really killed anyone so therefore if the murder never happened, then neither did the marriage. 

Furthermore, I'm pretty certain it wasn't performed in a legalised and registered location, The Marriages (Approved Premises) Regulations 1995 allow civil marriages to take place regularly in hotels, stately homes, pubs and football stadiums without compromising the fundamental principles of English marriage law and Parliament's intention to maintain the solemnity of the occasion. the validity of a venue requires prior agreement of the superintendent Registrar. Marriages and it must take place in readily identifiable premises to prevent marriages taking place in the open air, in transport or any other unsuitable location. - may I point that the ceremony in question was actually in open air and it certainly was not a "readily identifiable location". It must also be a dignified place in good state of repair, I do not believe the collapse of time itself is deemed a dignified place, it also lacked the fire precautions required by the fire authority. Yes I am being petty, but it annoyed me that much. 

Also. This one's a bit far fetched but it's a reasonable argument. The vows are "til death do us part". Technically River is already dead on the Doctors' timeline. Therefore death has parted them. And if the doctor is believed to be dead, the state won't recognise the existence of their marriage. Moreover, technically River married the robot doctor, not the actual Doctor. It wasn't the doctor who spoke the words, it was the robot. Therefore I deem the marriage totally void. I like to think the Doctor is fully aware of this and is simply having a bit of fun with no strings attached. Even so, he has genuine grounds for divorce under s1(2)(b) of the Matrimonial Clauses Act. Killing him is almost certainly classed as "unreasonable behaviour".

Moving on from my legal rant... Since the great Tennant years, we've always been warned of "fixed points in time" and finally we see what happens if one is messed with. To be quite honest I would enjoy living in a world where Dickens was regularly gracing my television. But surely as the Doctor didn't actually die, the "fixed point in time" has still been messed with? This episode had some great bits, some quality acting and a great storyline up until the wedding. It was so random and unneeded. There genuinely is no sexual tension between the Doctor and River, no matter how many flirty lines you throw around the script, there is just no spark. She has no endearing qualities about her and up until now the Doctor has always seemed surprised and cautious whenever she's made a move on him. There has been no change of heart nor any moment where we as viewers have seen him fall in love with her- discovering she's Amy's daughter wasn't a pivotal moment in their relationship romantically.  So I'm very confused as to when this change of heart happened.

So the time old question is Dr Who? It will probably end up being something completely mundane and it's a question that should never be answered as it would undermine the sanity of Dr Who's mystery. What is more important is the Christmas episode, featuring my West Country homeboy Bill Bailey, it's about time Dr Who had the slice of the West. Billy Piper is from Swindon (my nearest city AND she went to my ballet school) however she ignored her home roots, ditched the pompous farmer accent in favour of a Landan' twang. Shame on her. I hope Bill Bailey doesn't follow suit.